Today was interesting. At first Cray-Pee seemed to be OK...well, as close to OK as possible. It began with one of my co-workers' birthday. Being one that loves birthdays, she was super happy to celebrating a big one i.e. her 30th birthday. She had planned, with Cray-Pee's permission of course, to leave early and get lunch with her significant other. All was good...until the presents started arriving.
The secretary for our office began by giving her a little plan for her desk. Then a co-worker from a different department came over with a card, that sang....<insert ominous music>. Cray-Pee came over saying in her usual slurred voice "What the fuck is that crap?....ughhhhhh." When she saw it was a birthday card, she said "Oh fuuuuuck, was I supposed to get you something?" She ripped the card out of my co-worker's hands and signed it. She signed another card that another person who cares purchased for her....OK. Eh hem.
Next on the birthday agenda was a lovely bouquet of personalized cookies for her! So cute...Cray-Pee decided she was hungry and took a bite out of one of the cookies that probably cost $40 a piece and then said, "Oh...Oh shit, this is your birthday cookie, isn't it? Fuckkkkkkkkkkk...." and proceeded to place the bitten cookie back on it's peg...with the bite removed.
That being said, she decided to get my co-worker a present of her own...in the form of a Diet Coke from the 7-11 next door. It's more than I got for my birthday.....
Birthday regalia aside, we were scheduled to meet at 11am to discuss some more changes and additions to our current job in the form of writing a new script for our new job as bill collectors. Oh joy...
She "forgot" that she had a meeting scheduled at 10:30 and wouldn't be able to go to the meeting she scheduled for us...good thing none of know nothing about what's going on. She told us we can run the meeting appropriately.
As we're attempting to run a meeting about a subject we have no idea about...as successfully as possible, she saunters in and asks us to finish up before 12:00pm and then left. Sick of the whole thing, I went back to our office and told her that we needed her assistance. She begrudgingly decided to come down to the meeting.
We told her our ideas. She of course, said that her tiny little 2 sentence blurb she gave us, was enough for us. And that's that. She then proceeded to point out that I looked "Pissed off as all hell." I made the point that the script wasn't enough to concrete an appointment with these people and on Monday in or crazy meeting, she said that there would be a goal associated with this new job. How can I be assessed on something I have no control over. She than proceeded to tell us "Oh my God...no...no....there's no goals. Get that out of your head...there's no goals associated with this. Dammit....calm down! There are no goals...just do your best." (Please see 10-18-10 to realize that this happens quite often).
Whatever the case may be, the meeting broke. She popped some more Pez and the work day continued, with her sulking and shooting me nasty looks, as she almost fell asleep at the front desk while covering the secretary's lunch shift. Just another day in Crazy-Pee Town.
10-19-10
Just received this email:
Soooooo, without taking any responsibility,J***, we now are working the leads again. If you set it, you get it. I’ll take the accountability heat on my end. thank you for not killing or maiming anyone during this lovely time.
10-18-10
Today was a fairly normal day considering the usual insanity that goes on in our office. To re-cap the last week: my wonderful boss, Cray-Pee, was arrested for a DUI last Sunday. She then took two days off, at the discretion of our organization's president for "personal reasons". Upon her return, she was not greeted with warm open arms from all the crazies in the office but to keep the peace, I and one other tried to act as normal as possible. All was ok, ignoring the giant gorilla in the room, until she proceeded to tell me what jail was like....and how skeeved out she was while she was temporarily incarcerated. After she tearfully asked me if I "hated her" for what she did, I did my best to ignore it............
The following day she walked by my desk to tell me that the shirt she was wearing was her "jail shirt" as she slightly caressed her bosom in a most disconcerting way....
Eh-hem. Today, again, was as normal as possible. We had our big Monday meeting, per usual and of course bombs were dropped: our job was changing, we were no longer a huge part of what we once were and are now considered "supplemental".
No worries, she says, nothing will change and we'll still have jobs....
Me thinking: wait, didn't you just say things were changing?
Ok...so there are no goals any longer but that doesn't mean you still don't have to work. You do.....and there will be goals of some kind....wait, didn't you just say there were no goals?
So, I want you all to be happy so I just want you guys to know that we're not doing anyting differently with this department. There was talk of "downsizing" two months ago, but I haven't mentioned it again and I'm not going to. You all deserve to be here but you need to prove your worth here....wait, didn't you just say that there was no fear of downsizing?
So now I'll open the floor to suggestions:
Me: Can we get a manual explaining everything you just said?
The following day she walked by my desk to tell me that the shirt she was wearing was her "jail shirt" as she slightly caressed her bosom in a most disconcerting way....
Eh-hem. Today, again, was as normal as possible. We had our big Monday meeting, per usual and of course bombs were dropped: our job was changing, we were no longer a huge part of what we once were and are now considered "supplemental".
No worries, she says, nothing will change and we'll still have jobs....
Me thinking: wait, didn't you just say things were changing?
Ok...so there are no goals any longer but that doesn't mean you still don't have to work. You do.....and there will be goals of some kind....wait, didn't you just say there were no goals?
So, I want you all to be happy so I just want you guys to know that we're not doing anyting differently with this department. There was talk of "downsizing" two months ago, but I haven't mentioned it again and I'm not going to. You all deserve to be here but you need to prove your worth here....wait, didn't you just say that there was no fear of downsizing?
So now I'll open the floor to suggestions:
Me: Can we get a manual explaining everything you just said?